Wednesday, June 10, 2009

An answer to many questions

Today I had my first Dr's appt. for my pregnancy. I wasn't nervous, just wanted to finally see the growing baby in my tummy. But when the Nurse Practitioner was doing the exam, there was no baby! I am really sad that the baby didn't make it, but for some reason I wasn't completely shocked. I kind of had a feeling that something wasn't quite right, but only since Sunday. I would rather have a miscarriage early on than any later in the pregnancy. Plus, I feel comfort knowing things happen for a reason. Of course, I don't know the reason, but maybe in the next life, there will be an explanation. I was due Jan 5th and I was 10 weeks.

I had to get an ultrasound just to make sure that the Nurse didn't miss anything. Sure enough, there was no baby. It measured to be six weeks in size, but you can never know exactly when the fetus dies. And after it dies, it starts to shrink. So it could have been even last week that the fetus stopped developing. There was the sac though, and it looked as though my body will be able to take care of it naturally. I really hope it won't be too painful. I haven't started any bleeding yet, and that's what I think the Nurse was confused about the most. So I'm anticipating a few bad days this week and maybe even next week.

I'm grateful for Mark, a worthy priesthood holder, and the blessings he gives me to offer peace and comfort during a time like this. I know things will work out and that we will be able to get pregnant again later this year. When things like this happen, it makes me even more grateful for the healthy kids I already have and the wonderful blessing they are to me.

23 comments:

Terry Family said...

Stacy,
Oh I'm so sorry! I didn't know you were pregnant (maybe you hadn't told people yet). I hope you're feeling okay. Love ya!

micah e. said...

My thoughts are with you!

Danielle said...

I'm sorry that it didn't make it. That is terribly hard emotionally. I am glad that you are understanding and taking it so well. (Writing it down is one thing, but living it is much harder.) Good luck in the next few weeks. Lots of love and hugs.
-Danielle

The Bunkers said...

I'm sorry to hear that, Stacy. We'll be thinking about you.

Kara said...

I'm so sorry Stacy. I hope you can recover quickly and be comforted in your knowledge of the gospel and your good faith. You have such good understanding and faith- more than I would have at times like this. Take care and let me know if there's anything I can do for you. Love ya!

Me said...

Oh Stacy! You are such an inspiration! You have such a sweet testimony and such strong faith! I know the Lord will bless you because you, without a doubt, bless others everyday. Let's get pregnant together, k? :-) Hang in there and treat yourself to some Fro Yo, a sleezy mag, and a warm bath!

Natalie said...

Oh Stacy I am so sorry to hear this. I have been thinking that you must be pregnant for the last few weeks. I will keep you and your sweet family in my prayers and if you ever need to talk I am always here. I love you!!!

High Heels and a Sippy Cup said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Stacy and Mark. My thoughts and prayers will be turned to you this week.

Tara said...

Im soo sorry to hear this. That must be rough. Well keep you in our prayers and hope you feel ok =(

Michelle and Andrew said...

Stacey, I am so sorry. I had a miscarriage right before this pregnancy and I was only 5 weeks, it would be way harder in your situation. I truely am sorry. I just try to think about how I would rather have a healthy baby than one that struggles throughout pregnancy.

Lynette said...

You have such great perspective. What a hard thing. Thanks for being such a great inspiration.

Allred Family said...

So sorry to hear that....Hope you start feeling better soon. Its so nice knowing that everything happens for a reason and it will all work out for the best in the end. Take it easy and try to relax this week!!!!

Celeste said...

What a heartbreaking story, I, too, am so sorry. I hope the next few days go smoother than planned.

Amy said...

I didn't know you were pregnant for sure but wondered after one of your posts recently. I always felt bad for people who had a miscarriage before but since we lost our baby this year I now have a new emotional reaction when people lose a baby. I am so sorry. I know that you will make it through this and I hope that it doesn't take too long for you to recover emotionally and physically. If you ever just need to cry call me!

Kaerlig said...

Stacy, I'm sorry to hear about the miscarriage. It is emotional no matter how far along...but you are right...I'd rather have a miscarriage early on (and I have had 3 just about like the one you are having). It's the pitts. It doesn't make it less painful to know that it is considered "normal". I'll be thinking of you. Love Kaerlig

Angie said...

My sympathies are with you, Stacy. I'm impressed with how well you seem to be handling it, and you do have two fantastic children. Speaking of which, Bryanna's birthday looks like it was amazing! I never cease to be impressed by all that you do.

Casey & Katie Ford said...

We'll pray for you guys. It was so good to see you not too long ago. We love you.

Erin said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad you have a great husband who can help you. Hugs.

Marilene said...

you're in my prayers and thoughts!

Mike and Heather said...

You have a TON of faith because you had a feeling you were going to have one even before you got pregnant. You are an ispiration to me! I hope I can one day be as spiritually (and temporally) awesome as you are!

Melanie said...

Stacy, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. But it sounds like you have a great optimistic perspective. That should help you get through this tough time. I wish you the best and know that we are praying for your family.

Chrissy said...

I am so sad for you! Even when we have a feeling and know it is still hard to get over. I hope that you can get through this quickly. You are in my thoughts and prayers!

Jenn said...

Tim & I am so sorry to hear about this difficult time for you and your family! We hope you can feel peace and comfort. Your family is so lucky to have such a strong and faithful woman like you in their life!